Where My Heart and Soul Belongs: A Divergent Story
by fortheloveofdivergence
Summary: Ariel Caesar: the lone transfer from Erudite, and a ghost from Eric's past. Both different, both strong, both running from a life where they never truly belonged. Follow Ariel as she invents a new life for herself, and changes a few lives in the process. (Set in the year before Tris' initiation, and not entirely canon-compliant.)
1. The Choice

"Is your dress ironed?"

"Yes."

"And you've thought about your decision?"

"Yes."

"Are you nervous?"

I pause in my automatic answering, looking up from where I sit, perched on the edge of my bed. My mother is in the doorway, still dressed in her white lab-coat from work, worrying her bottom lip between her two teeth. She's still beautiful, with her long blonde hair braided down her back, glasses sitting on the bridge of her nose, green eyes watching and focused. My brother had looked just like her, tall and graceful, blonde and beautiful. I, on the other hand, looked more like my father: red hair, green eyes, freckles dotting my skin. Despite that, though, my mother was my best friend.

"No," I finally said, though my eyes said differently. My mother watched me for a long moment, seeing through my lie like the true Candor-born that she was, then stepped forward, dropped down into a crouch in front of my legs. I reached out at the same time that she did, our hands joining in the middle and resting on my lap.

"I know that you are feeling tremendous amounts of pressure today. Being at the top of your class comes with its expectations, and everyone in the faction will be expecting you to stay here. Maybe you are even expecting yourself to stay here. It is, after all, the most logical thing to do. You'd be guaranteed a wonderful and high-ranking job, and you'd probably find a smart and hard-working husband, what with your good looks and brains."

She smiled, and even I could see the way that her eyes grew a little sad under her mask of motherly protection. I knew that she was right, that I should think about my opportunities here, in Erudite. That I should think about my parents, who have already lost one child, and don't deserve to lose another. Maybe that was why her next words shocked me so much.

"But I also know you, sweetheart. I know that you aren't happy here, at least not now. I know that you've never been completely logical, as I was never completely honest while I was a dependent at my old faction. And, knowing this, I want you to make this decision today based on your own feelings. You go where you belong. If that means staying here, then good. If that means defecting—then so be it. I will always be your mother. I will always love you."

Her green eyes swam just like mine, and it took every ounce of strength I had to keep from crying. I nodded, swallowing thickly and squeezing her hands tightly, giving her all of the reply that she needed. And, with that, she stood, kissing my forehead and exiting the room.

I pretended not to notice how she wiped her eyes as she left, and I pretended that I didn't do the same.

The trip to the Choosing Ceremony was short and silent. I'd smoothed out my blue dress more than a few times as I walked, trying to stay collected as my heartrate picked up. The time to choose was nearing, and it was both an exciting and nerve-wracking thought.

My father hadn't spoken much before we left, only hugging me and kissing my forehead before locking up the house behind us. Even now, my parents wore calm masks, my mother's arm linked with my own, and my father staying close to my other side, not touching either of us, but still an anchor as we walked.

The seats of the auditorium were cold and uncomfortable, though I found it a welcome distraction from the buzz of conversation going on around me. It was rare, for Erudite dependents to transfer. Our faction was a proud one, and not many ever defected. I knew for a fact that there would only be a small handful even considering it—myself being one of them.

Normally, I wasn't this anxious. My friends always knew me as friendly and respectful, knowing when to be sarcastic and knowing when to be serious. Today, though, was a tough day for me. Would I stay here, in Erudite? Take up my place among the scholars and stay close to my parents? Or would I defect, and attempt to find my place in another faction, possibly giving up future contact with my parents ever again? Most would leave it up to the test to decide for them.

My aptitude test hadn't helped me, though.

The Abnegation woman who had administered my test had looked worried, though she'd tried to fake a smile. Divergent, is what they called it. I'd heard some of the adults in Erudite whispered about Divergence, speaking as if it were a secret curse that rivaled something as horrible as a terminal illness or an unspeakable act of violence.

I didn't know what to make of it, really. The Erudite in me was trying figure out the best and most logical choice.

I looked around the bustling room which was just beginning to settle down. My eyes first caught on to the bright and cheerful colors of Amity. Would I choose them, and become an advocate for peace and neutrality? Or what about Candor, my mother's faction? Would I join them, and live a life of honesty and trustworthiness?

Then there was Abnegation, where I would pledge myself to serving others and willingly giving up my own preferences. Erudite came next, where I already knew how my future would go.

And then there was Dauntless, who were the rowdiest of the five factions. Would I join them, and live a life of bravery and protection? I didn't have long to make up my mind, though I already knew where my heart was at.

Marcus Eaton began to call out names, starting with the Z surnames. I paid close attention to each Choice, noting that no dependents from Erudite had defected yet. This was clearly one of the better years for the faction, where little-to-no dependents chose to leave.

And then it happened.

"Ariel Caesar."

I'd rehearsed this moment in my mind nearly a hundred times. With one last smile at my parents, I stood, smoothing out my dress and stepping past them to enter the stairs leading down to the front of the auditorium. I made no noise as I padded up to the table, the hall falling silent behind me as I picked up the silver knife. My entire faction knew who I was. They were all watching with held breaths for my Choice.

I carefully cut my hand with the knife, setting it back down and holding my now empty hand under the cut, ensuring that my blood did not drip into any bowl until I meant for it to.

_Grey stones. Soil. Water. Glass. Hot coals. _

_Abnegation. Amity. Erudite. Candor. Dauntless. _

With one last deep breath, I thought of my family, my friends, my _brother. _Would he be proud of me? Would he want me to stay here, with our parents? Or would he want me to leave, and be happy? I could almost see his face behind my eyelids, the same reassuring smile that I always loved telling me that everything would be okay.

I removed my hand from under the cut, straightening my arm and relishing in the sound of my blood hissing on hot coals, accompanied by the gasps of my old faction and the cheers of my new faction.

_Dauntless. _

I remember seeing him.

He was a few years older than me, always a few classes ahead, but I still saw him nonetheless. Even back then, Eric was a recognizable person: always a little taller than the other boys, a little smarter, a little wiser. For some, that made him a hot commodity. For others, that made him a target.

I remember noticing him in the hallways of our school. The girls always flocked after him, whispering about the less-than-interested looks he'd give them and pretending like they actually meant something. I would always shake my head and laugh to myself, because those girls were too dense for children of Erudite.

But, even though I remember seeing him back then, I'm sure that Eric never saw me.

He and my brother had always been close, spending more time than not together. They were the same age, the same height, and even had the same interests. My parents used to joke that Eric and Tyler were so alike, that they were obviously long-lost twins. Sometimes I was jealous of that, but then I would remind myself that my brother still loved me, would do anything to protect me, and would always save time for me. Eric and I never talked much, only sparingly. We were in different years, and more-than-casual contact with someone outside of your year was discouraged and illogical, for that person was older and might defect. Still, though, I was always happy to receive rare smiles and nods of approval from the older kid.

I was always intelligent, battling for the top spot in my class, and sometimes coming out on top. And, in Erudite, being the top of your class meant that you were noticed, revered, and celebrated. Not to Eric, though. His distance only got worse when my brother passed away, the unbeatable cancer taking his life before his own Choosing Ceremony. Anyone with eyes could see the way that he looked out across the city with a sense of longing, how he would watch the Dauntless jump and run around with a want—no, a _need_—to do the same. Eric may have been cut out for the top spots in Erudite, but I always knew that his heart and soul were with the black-clad warriors.

And now, standing on this rooftop with my Erudite blues scuffed and ripped, I could see just how correct I'd been. The jump from the train had my heart racing already, but it nearly stopped when I saw him standing there, waiting for us.

This Eric was different—he was stronger, taller, and comfortable. The tattoos on his neck and arms stood out against the typical pale skin of Dauntless and Erudite, the factions that spent the most time indoors or underground. His face was hard, his jaw set, eyes focused as he scanned the crowd of initiates that I stood in the center of. This Eric was at home, and though everything about him screamed danger and cruelty, I couldn't help but notice that the pinched and uncomfortable set of his shoulders was gone, left in Erudite along with his past life.

And, like Eric, I was a transfer. I was the intelligent and promising student, obviously meant for leadership in the Faction of Intelligence and Logic. I was the genius-in-the-making. I was the revered and the hated.

And now, I'm Dauntless.


	2. Welcome to Dauntless

The jump from the train had rattled my bones, but it felt surprisingly good. The rush of adrenaline that was coursing through my veins was so different than anything I'd ever felt before, and I found myself loving it already. No wonder the Dauntless members always looked so…._alive_. There was no thought of my family or Erudite in my mind anymore. All I could think about was my new faction, and the life it would bring.

The herd of initiates made their way over to where some Dauntless adults were standing. I was towards the middle, standing beside a slightly taller girl from Candor. She turned to me, cocking an eyebrow with a small smile before offering her hand to shake. I returned the smile and the handshake, but before I could introduce myself, she shook her head. "I've heard that we can choose new names when we enter Dauntless, so how about we introduce ourselves after that?"

It surprised me that we could so easily pick a new name and identity, but it was also…refreshing. I nodded, taking in her appearance so that I could find her again if we got separated. She was quite pretty, with olive-toned skin and hazel eyes brought out by her shoulder-length brown hair. She had a friendly face, too, and I could already tell that we would be fast friends.

I was brought from my thoughts suddenly by a booming voice—Eric's voice—and everyone around me seemed to jump a little, too.

"My name is Eric, and I'm one of your leaders. From the moment that you chose this faction at the Choosing Ceremony, you've started your testing. From here on out, everything is part of your initiation. That includes getting into Dauntless in the first place."

He was tall, taller than I remember, and much stronger. And he was a leader?—he'd just transferred the year before, how did he become a leader that quickly? He hadn't seemed to see me yet, though I'm not sure if he'd even recognize me, anyways. Maybe he didn't even remember me. I definitely remembered him, though, and I felt a pang in my chest at the thought of my brother. That's when the Candor girl nudged her elbow into my side, nodding towards Eric, and, more importantly, the ledge he was standing on.

Holy shit.

They wanted us to jump.

My eyes widened, and that familiar feeling of adrenaline pumped through my veins again, mixed with skepticism. Eric stepped down from the ledge smoothly, landing with a cat-like grace that I only wished I could harness. "You want us to jump off of a ledge," another Candor boy said, disbelief lacing his voice. Eric turned towards the boy, and I had to strain to look over the shoulder of another initiate to see what was going on.

"I never said I _wanted_ you to jump off of a ledge, initiate. I _am_ saying that, if you want to get into Dauntless, you'll have to jump off of a ledge. If I'm being honest, Candor, I don't give a damn if you jump off of the ledge. But if you don't, you're Factionless. Pick your poison." Eric cocked an eyebrow, his two piercings glinting in the sunlight against his pale skin. His voice was hard and disinterested, and it put me off for a moment. Maybe it was because I remembered Eric from when he would hang out with Tyler—laughing, running around, wrestling. But this Eric was cool, collected, mature, and strong. This Eric was what everyone thought a Dauntless should be.

The Candor shut his mouth quickly, though I could tell that he was fuming on the inside. Eric just smirked a little, turning and leaning back against the ledge, arms crossed over his chest. "Alright, so who's gonna go first? I don't have all day, here."

And, just like that, the entire rooftop went silent, the only sound being the retreating train's clacks and groans. No one wanted to go first. No one wanted to risk it. But, also, no one wanted to go last, and to be seen as a coward. Everyone knew that cowards were looked down upon in Dauntless.

It seemed like hours before someone stepped forward: a Dauntless-born with short cut hair and two piercings in her bottom lip. She walked up to the ledge with a false confidence—I could tell that it was false, because her hands were shaking a little bit. Hmm. Even the Dauntless-borns were a little afraid.

Everyone watched with held breaths as she climbed up onto the ledge, standing there, clenching and unclenching her fists a few times as she built up the courage to actually jump. I heard Eric pipe up from his spot nearby, lounging against the ledge. "Do I have to push you, initiate?"

I scowled a little, because that was a bit of a jerk thing to say. At least she was the first to volunteer, who cared if she was taking a few moments to work herself up to it? But, his taunting worked, apparently, because the girl took a deep breath and jumped, screaming a few times on the way down. I watched as a few initiates bolted forward to see if she'd lived or not, and barely held in a laugh as the Dauntless adults ushered them back with silent glares.

Everyone fell silent again, and then a sound reached us, faint, but there. It was excited clapping and cheering from below, and every initiate relaxed at the sound of it. She'd made it. With the immediate threat gone, I felt a lot better about having to jump to enter Dauntless, and found myself stepping forward before Eric even had the chance to ask for the next jumper. I only realized that I had stepped forward when I was almost at the ledge, and that's when my heart leapt up in my throat. I could feel all eyes on me, _his_ eyes on me, and I briefly wondered if he had figured out who I was.

'Well, I'm already up here,' I thought to myself, taking a deep breath and carefully climbing up onto the ledge. I took care in not looking at Eric, sure that I would give away all of my emotions if I did. I would not be a coward.

I swallowed thickly, trying to calm down as I looked down at the hole in the building. It looked big, but I could tell that if I jumped out too far, my momentum would force me into one of the edges, resulting in injury or death. Damn my Erudite mind.

I could do this.

Before anyone could taunt or push me, I clenched my jaw, stepping off of the ledge and letting out a yelping sound as I felt nothing but air underneath me.

And then it was done. My body hit something soft and bouncy, catching me before I could even come close to hitting the ground. It took a moment to register the feeling of a net under my back, but when I did, a relieved laugh escaped me. A net. There was a net down here. They weren't trying to kill us.

My moment of relief was interrupted when someone yanked on the side of the net, sending me toppling into someone's arms. My feet hit hard ground as I steadied myself, looking up into the eyes of a Dauntless adult. He was taller than me, and looked hard and calculating, but also a little welcoming. "What's your name, initiate?"

I felt my mouth drop open as I tried to come up with an answer, my mind failing me for the first time in my life. We could choose new names, or that's what the Candor girl had said. But did I want a new name?

"Ari," I said before I could stop myself, a small smile curling on my lips. A new name. A new start.

"Second jumper: Ari," the man said, taking my hand and thrusting it into the air as cheers erupted around us. That's when I noticed the large group of Dauntless adults in the room—a welcoming committee of sorts. I was pulled into the group, a few people clapping me on the back, some others yanking me in for a hug, before I was deposited out next to the first jumper. She was grinning just like me, and our smiles only grew as we heard the third jumper hit the net. We were in.

It took a while, but all of the initiates ended up in Dauntless. I'd found the Candor girl again, who was named Rachel. I'm not sure if that was her old name or her new name, but either way, we agreed to be friends.

We talked for a while before the man, (I would learn that his name was Four), interrupted us. Rachel was apparently an only child, and only had a mother. She said that her father had left them to be Factionless back when she was young, and I frowned just at the thought. One of the only reasons that a Candor would become Factionless was to tell a huge lie—like committing adultery in secret, or something of that ilk. She shrugged it off, though, and let me tell her about my own family. I had just finished telling her about my brother when Four interrupted us, whistling loudly to get our attention.

"Alright, listen up. Dauntless-born, I want you to go with Zeke. He won't be your instructor, but Lauren is otherwise disposed at the moment and will catch up with you later. You don't need a tour, so don't ask for one. Also, I'd better not catch you visiting your family. Don't cause any trouble, either. Go to your dorms and then get your asses to dinner. Transfers, stay with Eric and I."

I watched as more than half of our group filtered out, following a darker-skinned man away from the net and towards an opening in the wall that I'd failed to see before. Now that the Dauntless-borns were out of the way, I could see exactly what my fellow transfers looked like. There were no Abnegation, which wasn't really a surprise, but there were quite a few Candors. I counted around eight or nine before moving on to Amity. Surprisingly, there were nearly five kids from Amity, while I was the only person from Erudite. Hm. Definitely a good year for Erudite.

Once again, I was yanked from my thoughts as Four spoke, addressing just us now. "First of all, welcome to Dauntless. I'm Four, as you know, and that there is Eric. I'm going to be your primary instructor during initiation, but Eric will also be involved. We aren't going to get into specifics until tomorrow, when your training begins. For now, you're going to receive a tour, be assigned your dorm and new clothes, and your first dinner as a Dauntless initiate."

I frowned a little at the way that Eric and Four moved around each other. The leader had jumped after everyone else, and had moved to stand near four, though there was a tense gap between them both physically and in the way Four said his name.

Eric looked over us, his eyes calculating. He didn't speak, just looked. I felt his steel gray eyes on my face, stopping longer on me than any other transfer. I looked back, holding his gaze with mine. I saw a glint of recognition in his eyes, the tiniest bit of softness, but then it quickly changed into…coldness. Coldness, and anger, and it was like a bad case of whiplash. Why would he be angry with me? We had barely even spoken to each other before he'd defected, so what reason would he have to be like this?

I didn't have long to ponder about it, though. The transfers started to move, following behind Four as he lead us away from the nets. We walked through a few different tunnels, the sound of thumping music growing louder. I was towards the back of the group with Rachel, the two of us sticking close together as we entered the unfamiliar faction. Unfortunately, though, that put me closer to Eric, who was behind the entire group. I could feel his eyes burning into the back of my head, though I forced myself to stay strong and calm.

It didn't take long for the tour to be done with, ending at the dorms. I made sure to pay attention, trying to memorize every tunnel and doorway that we'd went through. The last thing that I needed was to get lost in this maze of underground rooms.

The clothes that we were provided were standard and black, a refreshing change from my blue dress. I felt a little uncomfortable, changing in front of everyone else, but I forced my mind into the clinical and logical side that I would always have, ignoring the wandering eyes and slipping into a pair of black pants, followed by a tight-fitting long-sleeved shirt and some black boots. As I looked around and saw everyone else dressed a lot like me, all looking like we belonged here in Dauntless.

Dinner was surprisingly fun. We sat with the other transfers, getting to know each other over hamburgers and vegetables.

There was a darker-haired initiate from Candor, Luke, who I'd found to be quite friendly. He was brutally honest, of course, almost dangerously so, but he was funny, too. I found out that him and Rachel had been good friends back in Candor. And then there was Ty, from Amity, who was tall and strong from lifting logs and doing agriculture work back in his old faction. I could immediately tell why he wasn't in Amity. Ty wasn't peaceful or always-happy by any means. No, he was intense, and I knew he'd end up being a top initiate.

There were a few others, but those two and Rachel were the ones who stuck out the most to me. We sat together all throughout dinner, laughing and joking around, until the others in the hall began to bang their cups on the tables, the clattering sounds overcoming the talking as five people appeared on the balcony above us. I looked up, seeing Eric there, standing beside a large black man and three others. These must be our leaders.

I forced myself to not look at Eric, instead looking at the leader in the middle, who raised his hand and silenced the banging. "My name is Max. Initiates, stand." Those of us wearing initiates' uniforms stand, including me, and I step to the side so I'm able to see past Ty's shoulder. Damn tall people.

"Today, you have chosen the warrior faction. We are tasked with the defense of this city and everyone in it. We here in Dauntless believe in ordinary acts of bravery, and the courage that makes one person to stand up for another. I expect you to respect that. Do us proud."

I found that Max's words brought a smile to my face, one that only grew when the Dauntless members began picking us up, holding us above the crowd and cheering in our honor.

We were home.


	3. Training

The beds in Dauntless' dorms weren't comfortable.

I'd figured that out soon after laying my head down. The mattress was just thick enough to provide some cushion, but nowhere near as thick as my old mattress in Erudite. The pillows were nice, though, and the blanket had a lining in it that kept heat in and cold out. I couldn't complain, because I'd chosen this.

Unknowingly, I'd also chosen the Chasm, and the possibility of becoming Factionless.

Four woke us up early on our first morning, banging a metal rod against the staircase and shouting for us to, and I quote: "Get your lazy asses up and down the hall. Five minutes." All of the initiates scrambled out of bed, yanking on the nearest set of black clothes and shoes before jogging out down the hallway. We were heading towards the Pit, which we'd seen the day before, when we were stopped by Four and…Eric, of course. They were waiting on us by an opening in the wall, and when we reached them, I could see that it lead out to what looked like a break in the ground.

"Good morning, sunshines," Eric said suddenly, looking too smug and sarcastic for it to be this early. I shifted a little bit, halfway hidden behind Rachel, so that I could see him and Four both, my Erudite brain telling me that I needed to soak up as much information as possible in order to get a head start, even if the leader assigned to us seemed to already hate me.

Which, of course, confused the hell out of me. What had I done?—nothing, really. The only thing that I could think of was that he didn't remember who I was, which was perfectly plausible, and that he just hated any reminder of his old faction.

Once again, I didn't have long to ponder over Eric and his sudden anger towards me, because the crowd of initiates was now following the two instructors through the opening in the wall. Some of the initiates in the front came to an abrupt halt, and I could hear a few surprised gasps. Rachel, who had apparently decided that she wanted to be as curious as an Erudite, wrapped her hand around my wrist and pulled me forward through the group, stopping when we were in front and…extremely close to the edge of a huge break in the ground.

"Welcome to the Chasm, initiates," Four called, leaning on the railing beside Eric and crossing his arms. "This here is the beginning and the ending of life at Dauntless. The beginning, because it is at this point that we begin to teach you about being a member of Dauntless. The end, because many a Dauntless, both initiates and members, have met their end at the bottom of the Chasm."

Eric nodded, pushing off the railing and turning towards us. I looked at him, taking in how he seemed completely comfortable standing so close to the edge of the Chasm, even with Four right there next to him. So maybe they had some hostilities, but it appeared that they trusted each other enough to not try and kill one another. Interesting.

"There is a fine line between bravery and idiocy," Eric said, motioning towards the Chasm. "If you wish to jump, then by all means do. But we Dauntless members use this place as a constant reminder to be brave, and to protect, but to also be smart about it. Remember that during your training, and you'll be alright. For now." Eric's eyes landed on me as he said that last part, and I forced myself to suppress a shiver, glancing down at the Chasm below.

I would not be one of those initiates at the bottom. Not of my own choice.

Eric and Four looked at each other, then, communicating silently for a few moments. Then, Four stood up straight, sighing a little before speaking out. "And here is where we begin your training. You'll be graded from here on out on everything you do. Every fight, every exercise – all of it will count in your rankings, which will be updated daily. There are three phases to training. If, at the end of Phase One, you are at the bottom, then you're out."

A great silence settled over the group of initiates, and I felt my heart almost stop. Out? What did he mean, out?—"At the end of each phase, the lowest ranking initiates will be leaving us and becoming Factionless. If you have a problem with this, then you can get out now and stop wasting our time. Otherwise, be brave, be Dauntless, and face that challenge head on."

Again, Eric's eyes landed on me, and I couldn't tell what kind of expression he held in his eyes. Confusing was an understatement for this man. I pushed all thoughts of Eric the Man away, though, and focused on Eric the Leader. I didn't need to get so distracted.

Uneasy grumbles moved throughout the group, everyone nervous now that they knew the risk in Dauntless training, though no one spoke too loudly so as not to induce the wrath of one of the instructors. Maybe that's why we all followed Four and Eric obediently into the training room—fear and anxiety.

Training went as I expected it would. We started off by working out and running, Four aiming to build up our stamina and endurance before beginning the real part of training. I'd never been big on running and working out – our minds were our strength in Erudite – so it was extremely tough on me. First, we stretched, and my muscles began to burn before we'd even tried anything. Then, came the running. Ten laps around the entire training room, twenty push-ups and curls, then five laps, ten push-ups and curls, and repeat. We did this for what seemed like hours, though in reality it was only about ninety minutes. Just when I felt as if I were about to pass out, Four called time and sent us to breakfast.

I honestly don't remember how I made it there without falling down, but I fell into a seat beside Ty within ten minutes, groaning and chugging down the offered glass of water. I didn't feel so ashamed, though, because all of us initiates looked like that.

Breakfast consisted of protein. Eggs, toast, bacon, and more eggs. And did I mention eggs?—because they were there, too. We didn't talk much, just ate and drank as much water as we could handle, knowing that we'd need it in order to continue the rigorous workouts that were doubtless planned for us. And, just as I thought, we went right back to the training room after breakfast, but this time, we began fighting techniques.

Four showed us a defensive stance, first, and I figured that they were teaching us this because we were inexperienced. I knew that most Dauntless fought with an offensive stance, but they had years of practice under their belts. I'd never even punched someone once in my life.

The maneuvers felt weird to me, but I did them anyways, determined to get it right. Rachel and I practiced on adjacent punching bags, giving each other tips here and there, as well as some small-talk.

"Your legs are too far apart."

"Your arm isn't bent correctl—yeah, like that."

"Our instructors are pretty hot, yeah?"

"Shut up, Rachel, they'll hear you."

"No, seriously. And Eric keeps looking at you, you lucky bitch."

I just shook my head at that one, knowing that she was joking. The only reason that Eric would look at me now would be to glare at me. And, as living proof of that, the next time I glanced over in his direction, he was glaring at me.

Well, damn.

Other than that, training went by fairly quickly. We broke for lunch after hours of practicing on the punching bags, and Four told us to take the rest of the day off after lunch.

"But, if any of you cause trouble, I'll double the running tomorrow, got it?"

"Triple the running," Eric piped up from where he was standing behind all of us. It was a mind game, him being in all places at once like that. It set us all on edge and made everyone anxious, which would provoke mistakes and show who was truly cut out for this lifestyle. And I would prove myself. I had to.

Only a few groans ripped through the group before we all trudged out towards the dining hall. I sighed deeply as my blood stopped coursing so quickly, soreness beginning to settle into my muscles. "It's only the first day, and I'm almost dead," Rachel moaned, throwing an arm around me and relaxing a good bit of her body weight onto me. We both fell into the wall with a laugh, one that kept me bent over for a good minute. I needed a good laugh.

Once we'd collected ourselves, we went out to join Luke and Ty at the table we'd taken as our own. There were two others sitting with them already – a tall girl named Ember, and a wiry boy named Trace, both from Amity.

We bonded over sore muscles and aching bones, and, just like that, our friend group grew by a few more heads.

After lunch, the six of us headed out to explore the compound a little more. We didn't go very far from our designated area, only looking around in some of the shops. Before I knew it, dinner had come around, and we were heading back to the dining hall for food.

And that's when we found it.

The Dauntless chocolate cake.

We were lucky enough to have some of the Dauntless-borns sharing theirs, or we'd have gone without, but _Lord_ did it taste heavenly. I'm afraid I'd have joined Dauntless just for the cake, had I known about it.

And so, we went back to our dorm for the night with the taste of that cake on our tongues, feeling a lot better about the day's events than we had earlier.

I couldn't sleep.

Of course, on our second night here, I'd suffer from an inability to sleep. Maybe it was the sugary cake too close to bedtime, or maybe it was anxiety, but either way, I was wide awake.

So, I slipped out of bed and slid on a pair of long black socks to cover my feet. I already had on a pair of shorts to sleep in, and a tshirt, so I didn't bother putting on anything else. I yanked my hair out of the bun on the top of my head, combing my fingers through the curly strands as I walked out of the dorm and down the hallway.

My feet carried me to the Chasm without my brain even knowing it.

Once I was there, I sighed, deciding to stay for a little bit and clear my head. I sat down cross-legged away from the edge, folding my hands in my lap and looking out across the Pit. Though Dauntless was in a constant state of commotion during the day, it was unnervingly quiet at night, leaving one to their own thoughts, however unpleasant they may be.

The first thing that I thought of was Eric. The first thing that I heard was footsteps, and then his voice.

Speak of the devil.

"What the hell are you doing out here, initiate? You're supposed to be in bed."

His voice wasn't loud, but it seemed to echo for miles in the empty expanse of the Chasm. I was partially hidden by the shadows, though it's not like it mattered, anyways. He could probably still recognize me by my hair.

I looked up, my heartrate increasing marginally just by seeing him there, standing above me. "I-I couldn't sleep," I managed to say with minimal stuttering, which I was proud of. Up until Eric cocked an eyebrow, that is.

"As I said, you're supposed to be in bed. Why are you out here by the Chasm. You're not going to jump, are you?"

I felt a slight annoyance rise up in me, an annoyance that had been building up ever since I saw him on that damned ledge after the Ceremony. "You said you didn't care if we jumped, anyways, so why ask?"

Well, _shit_.

I could see the change in Eric's eyes, and tried to mentally shovel the words back into my mouth. I'd screwed up now. He went from looking annoyed to murderous in about two seconds.

Little did I know, his next words would be the ones to stop my heart completely, and would be the ones to answer all of my unanswered questions.

_"__You are just like your brother, Ariel." _


	4. The Chasm

_"__You are just like your brother, Ariel."_

My mouth dropped open a little bit at those words, all annoyance leaving my eyes, instead replaced by a little bit of shock and a little bit of pain.

"What the hell does that mean," I spat out before I could stop myself, though I didn't want to swallow those words this time. I wanted to say them. I wanted to know what gave him the right to talk about my brother so flippantly, and without any sort of remorse. I wanted to know why he could treat me like the bane of his existence, and then bring up my brother without a second thought.

Eric seemed slightly taken aback at my tone, his eyebrows rising a bit and an amused smirk turning the corners of his lips up. "I only meant that you've got his sarcasm and wit. Your brother could be a little shit sometimes, and apparently, so can you."

For some reason, that just set me on edge even more. Badly.

My eyes narrowed, and I could feel my face heating up. Eric seemed to notice how I wasn't softening up, and I relished in the tiny bit of regret I could see behind his smug mask. Now who was the one who wanted to take back their words?

"You don't get to talk about my brother like that. You don't get to talk about _me_ like that. He may have been your best friend, Eric, but he was my _brother_. He was my role model, and my mentor, and my support system. Never mind the fact that you barely spoke a sentence to me at a time before you defected – you can't just see me walk in here and decide to treat me like complete _shit_ just because. Why do you do that, anyways? I haven't done anything to you, Eric. I was the second jumper. I have followed all the rules. I'm working my ass off in training even though it hurts. What the hell have I done to you to make you treat me like this?"

I was breathing heavily by the end of it, and you'd have had to been blind to not see the tears in my eyes. I hated crying. I really did. People in Erudite tended to hide their feelings away, since emotions only tainted the mind's logical processes. But I wasn't in Erudite anymore, and talking about my brother hurt. So he could get over it.

I expected him to yell. I expected him to get angry, to tell me to fuck off or something. I expected a lot.

I didn't expect for his shoulders to drop, along with his smug grin, and a small, concerned frown to take its place.

"Ariel," he started, his voice still low and hard, but with a softer edge to it. It caught me off guard, in all honesty, and I had to remind myself that I was mad at him for a moment. Maybe my brother's death had affected him just as badly? Maybe he felt the pain every day, just like I did.

His next words may have proved that thought.

"_Fuck_, Ariel. You're just like him. You look like two completely different people, but you're just like him, still. You've always been smart, and witty, and funny, and _defiant_ as hell. He was my best friend, my brother too, and since the moment I saw you, all I can think about is his last words. How he looked on his deathbed, _begging_ me to take care of you. That's all I can think about when I look at you, and that's why I'm so angry, because I cou-," he stopped suddenly, the pained look in his eyes replaced by the now-familiar hard mask, his eyes going cold and dangerous, focusing on the tunnel near us.

That's when I heard the quiet footsteps of someone coming near, and I sucked in a quick breath, trying to calm down my breathing and blink back the tears that were threatening to spill over.

Eric turned away from me, and I could see how he shifted from Eric the Man to Eric the Leader. I'd have been intrigued if my mind weren't swimming with his confession. And, judging by the tension in his shoulders, I would assume that he hadn't even meant to reveal that much – that it had just come out without his permission.

I knew that feeling.

Suddenly, Luke emerged from the tunnel, looking sleepy and confused when he saw Eric and I standing there. "Hey, Ari," he mumbled, throwing a wary look at the seemingly-angry leader before turning back to her. "I saw that you weren't in your bed, and I got a little worried. You okay?"

The question was directed at both Eric and I, since Luke was probably wondering if I'd gotten into trouble of some kind. And, before I could answer, said leader turned towards Luke and nodded. "She's fine. Claimed she was having trouble sleeping, and I was patrolling. Don't eat so much of that sugary cake before bed, and you won't have that problem. Now, get your asses back to bed. You've got an early morning," he said gruffly, waving a hand at us in dismissal before turning away and retreating, his footsteps shockingly silent.

I stood rooted to the spot for a moment more, looking after him as if he'd grown two heads and a tail, before Luke wrapped his hand gently around my elbow, tugging me back towards the dorm. He didn't ask questions, which I was highly grateful for, and we both settled back into our respective beds with ease and silence.

I dreamed about my brother.

_"__You were always the smarter one out of the two of us, you know that?" _

_I shook my head, laughing as much as I was able to while sitting beside my brother's bed, the heart monitor a constant reminder of where we were at. I had his hand between my hands, and he felt cold. So cold. I would have been more worried if he hadn't been feeling this cold already for a few weeks. _

_He was weaker, too. My brother used to be tall, strapping, and able to lift me up without breaking a sweat. Now, he can't even sit up on his own. _

_Erudite was known for knowledge. We didn't have enough to save him. _

_"__Don't say that, Tyler. You're practically a genius. I wouldn't know everything that I know if it weren't for you," I said, blinking back the tears in my eyes that seemed to be a permanent fixture now. Tyler saw them, and he frowned lightly, squeezing my hand lightly – it was all the energy he could probably muster. _

_"__Don't cry for me, Ari. Come on. It's gonna be fine, I promise," he whispered, and, even though he was on his deathbed, Tyler's calming tone had an immediate effect on me. My shoulders relaxed, and I leaned forward, placing my head on his shoulder and sighing quietly. We didn't speak for a long while, but then he broke the silence. _

_"__Eric is hurting too. I know you two don't talk because of the don't-talk-to-someone-not-your-age thing, but you two should try. You know, before he defects. I know he will. He's been talking about Dauntless." _

_He paused to cough, and quickly waved away my concerned look. _

_"__Really, though. You two might need each other in the future, Ari. I think it would be a good thing, you helping each other out. He's not a complete prick, just stubborn as hell. A lot like you and I, really." _

_I did laugh at that, shaking my head fondly and kissing my brother's hand. I was about to speak again, when there was a knock at the door. _

_Speak of the devil. _

_Eric entered, dressed in his school clothes still, but looking a hell-of-a-lot less put together than normal. It was then that I knew he was taking this just as hard as my parents and I were._

_I left the room to give them some time to hang out, kissing Tyler's forehead and nodding towards Eric before escaping to my room to retreat into a book. A much needed distraction. _

_He died that night. _

I woke up with wet cheeks, which I was quick to remedy before anyone could see. Once again, Four was knocking a metal rod against the stairs and yelling for us to get up.

Training went as usual.

Eric didn't show up for four days straight.

And I was worried.

Those four days were a continuous cycle of sleep, eat, work out, practice, eat, and sleep some more. It was only on the fifth day that the routine changed, and it wasn't in a good way, either.

Eric entered the training room after breakfast on that fifth day, looking just as cold and dangerous as usual, and conveniently not even looking my way. He and Four shared a look before Eric stepped forward and whistled to get our attentions away from the punching bags and onto him.

"It's been over half a week now, and it's time for your first real evaluation. First jumper, in the ring. Last jumper, join her."

Eric paused, looking around at each and every transfer initiate.

"Time to fight."


	5. Punches and Chokeholds

_Luke v Andrea_

_Ty v Trace_

_Ember v Ari_

_Rachel v Michael_

_…__._

I didn't pay attention to the lineup board after that, too busy shooting a concerned glance Rachel's way. So far, there hadn't been any real problems with the other initiates. For the most part, everyone was somewhat friendly to each other.

Up until now, anyways.

Michael was a tall boy from Candor, and, according to Rachel and Luke, a total dick. Always trying to one-up the others around him, doing whatever he had to in order to rise to the top, that sort of thing.

That made him dangerous. And he was fighting Rachel.

I wasn't too worried about fighting Ember. We were around the same size and skill level, and I could tell that fighting each other would be a good first round. We'd get in some good practice now for the harder fights later on.

Or so I thought.

Luke and Andrea stepped up onto the raised platform that was the fighting ring, the rest of us crowding around it. I stood next to Rachel, our shoulders brushing together, and watched carefully. Andrea was an unnaturally tall girl from the same faction as Ty, though apparently they hadn't known each other well. She looked strong, though, and even I knew that here, in Dauntless, women could beat men just as much as men could beat women.

Luke glanced over at where Eric and Four were standing – the exact place that I was trying _not_ to look – and raised an eyebrow. "When should we stop sparring?"

I did look at Eric and Four after that, just in time to see Four's grimace and Eric's annoyed look. Who am I kidding?—Eric always looked annoyed, apparently. He spoke, then, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning back against one of the nearby metal columns, fixing his gaze on Luke and Andrea, "Until one of you can no longer fight."

An uneasy ripple ran through the initiates, and I silently prayed for Luke to keep his mouth shut about it. _Don't ask questions, Luke. Just say okay and move on._

For once, someone actually listened to me.

The fighting was brutal.

It was only our first day of fighting, and we were barely reaching the end of our first week, but it was still brutal. Luke and Andrea had fought for a good seven to eight minutes, each scoring some decent hits on the other. Eric and Four both prodded them – Eric more taunting than anything – hoping that they'd get it over with and actually put a hard hit on someone. Luke was the first to jump, and he scored three good hits to the jaw and a kick to the ribs before the match was called, Andrea on the ground and wheezing pitifully.

Luke looked conflicted, and even helped get her up himself, but he was a little beat up, too. I felt bad for them both.

Ty's fight against Trace ended badly for Trace. He was lanky, more quick than strong, but he wasn't experienced, yet. He didn't think to stay out of arm's reach, and Ty was able to lock him into a chokehold before the end of three minutes. Eric called the match just before Trace passed out.

Then it was my turn to fight.

Ember and I entered the ring, standing opposite of each other. She looked just as nervous as I did, but she also looked just as determined, too. We both knew that we couldn't take it easier on the other, and that we couldn't blame each other for any injuries we sustained. This was about rankings, and we had to do our best, friends or no.

Didn't mean that it didn't suck any less.

I forced my mind to move away from Eric and his burning gaze as we began, circling each other a few times before Ember lunged forward. Her fist glanced off of my shoulder enough to sting, but not enough to set me off balance. I returned the blow with a solid hit to her side, though it was below her ribs and therefore didn't cause much damage. We separated again and then went back in for it.

Was I scared to fight?—no. But it was a different experience than reading about it, that was for damn sure.

I wasn't too sure how long we fought for, but I do know that we were evenly matched. I had a bloody lip and a nice bruise beginning to form on my jaw, just as she would have a bruise on her stomach for a while after this. One thing that Amber did have over me, though, was her strength. She'd worked as a tree-climber in Amity, which had built up some muscles in her arms, shoulders, and core that I didn't have. This would be my downfall.

Ember would apologize for weeks about the hard punch she delivered to my temple, sending me sprawling to the floor as my vision blacked out.

The last thing that I remembered was Rachel's yell and a pair of warm arms wrapping around my body.

_"__She's never going to forgive me for this. I knocked her out. I didn't even mean to hit her that hard."_

_"__It's part of fighting, Ember. You have to fight for your spot in this faction, and if you have to knock out a few people to get there, then so be it." _

_"__I get that, Eric, but it was our first fight. And I could have sworn that she was going to bea—_Ari!"

I heard their voices before my eyes ever opened, groaning lowly as Amber's worried chattering was blocked out by a severe throbbing in my head.

Well, shit. She'd really done a good one on me.

Bright lights almost blinded me as I opened my eyes, letting them adjust before looking to my bedside. Ember was pacing at the foot of my bed, though she'd stopped when she heard my light groan, now just looking guiltily at my face. I probably had a hell of a bruise. I looked to my right, then, even though it hurt to move so quickly, and I was mildly surprised to see Eric there, lounging in a chair by my bedside like he owned the place.

He was a leader, actually, so he practically did own the place.

I expected to see the cold mask of indifference that was directed my way, so it didn't come as any shock. The feeling of his arms around my body was still burned into my memory and my nerves, but that didn't mean anything.

My tumultuous thoughts were interrupted by Ember squeezing my ankle, which was covered by a thin blanket. "How're you feeling, Ari," she asked me, looking a little wary, like I might lash out at her or something. I just forced my lips into the tiniest hint of a smile, lifting my hand to motion towards her own bruised face and arms. "I feel like shit, but you look like shit, so I'd say we're even," I replied, trying to lighten up the mood of the small medical area.

There was a privacy screen around my bed, though it probably didn't do much for sound. I still felt better with it in place, though. I didn't want the whole of Dauntless to see me at my weakest.

I heard a chuckle come from Eric, though that was the most human reaction that he allowed, settling back into his leadership mode with practiced ease.

I didn't even look at him, knowing that if I did, I'd end up trying to confront him about the night at the Chasm, and I was sure that he didn't want to talk about that, especially in front of Ember. And, as if he were reading my mind, Eric stood, motioning towards the privacy screen. "Alright, initiate. You may have won, and she may be your friend, but you still have some training left today. Get back to Four and you can come visit her later," he said gruffly, pointing towards the exit once more when Ember hesitated. I shot her a reassuring smile, giving her a halfhearted wave before she slipped out.

Eric watched her through a small split in the screen before coming back to sit at my bedside, though their was an obvious change in his body language, now.

His shoulders had relaxed, and the cold mask had been replaced by a softer look. A concerned look. The Dauntless leader sighed, running a hand over his chin – lightly stubbled, since he probably hadn't shaved that morning – and looking at my face. "You'll have a nice little bruise, there, but battle wounds are badges of honor around here. You'll be fine. Not to mention, you had that fight won, in my opinion. The only thing you need to work on is your strength. Your technique and your reading was flawless."

Wow. Had Eric really complimented me?—and more than once? I didn't know whether to be suspicious or elated. I went with the latter, because it was easier to be elated, and felt a small blush rise up in my cheeks.

"I guess that's the Erudite in me, right," I half-joked, not sure how he'd react to the name of our old faction. He took it in stride, though, nodding and narrowing his eyes in a contemplating look. We were silent for a few long moments, just looking at each other, trying to read what was in the other's eyes. He was good at guarding himself, so I couldn't tell much about what he was feeling, while I was like an open book.

"I know you want to talk about what happened at the Chasm. I know you're curious, and you're probably confused. I am, too. But what you do need to know from now on is that I'm going to keep my promise to your brother. He asked me to keep you safe, and I'm going to do what I can, without overstepping my boundaries. I can't pad your score, though I feel like you'd kill me for that, anyways," and he was proven right by my subsequent glare, "but I _can_ help strengthen what little muscles you do have. I had the same problem as you when I came here. Erudite strength of mind fostered weak of body, and you'd be surprised how quickly you'll be able to adapt. I can't do much else without showing blatant favoritism and ultimately losing my job, which would force you to become Factionless. Do you accept this offer?"

For a minute, I just sat there. Eric had just practically said an entire speech to me, and I was still trying to wrap my head around it. When I finally understood the gist of his proposal, my eyes widened and I frowned a little.

"Why do you want to help me? And don't give me some bullshit excuse that my brother asked you to do it in his dying breath. My brother is dead and gone, and there's no use in upholding his dying wishes just for the sake of doing it. So why?"

I could tell that he'd been expecting my question, though I could also tell that he was reluctant to answer it. Eric ran a hand through his hair, now, looking down at the floor between his boots and focusing on that, instead of me, as he answered. I didn't mind.

"From the moment you stepped up onto that ledge without prompting, I was intrigued by you. Of course, I knew who you were, but put all of that aside – I was taken with your defiance, and your wit, and your ability to just be smarter than the others around you. They were traits I'd always admired about you back in Erudite, though we rarely ever spoke. So take it at that. You're different than the other initiates, and I don't like to see potential go untapped. Leave it at that."

I knew there was more. I _knew_. But he just didn't want to tell me now, and I found that my heart was longing for him to spill it all. Just like I found that my heart was longing for him to stay when he rose from the chair and strode away without another word.

And that's when the realization hit me.

Shit. I wanted Eric.


	6. Well, Shit

**Well, Shit **

My revelation set me on edge.

I wanted Eric. There was nothing complicated about it, really. Emotions were quite simple, if you looked at them in a logical sort of way, which was an oxymoron in itself and made my brain hurt.

For years, I'd always sought the approving smiles that Eric would rarely send my way. I used to chalk it up to just wanting the approval of an older student, but really, it could have been the start of something more. Something much stronger. Maybe, when I saw him on the rooftop after the Choosing Ceremony, I chose to jump so that he'd notice me. Not because I wanted favoritism, but because I wanted him to recognize me. I wanted to know that he knew me.

And now, I hate to see him go? I want him to stay at my bedside as I laid there, nursing a concussion and a nice shiner?

It was making my head hurt even worse to think about it, so I just laid back, closing my eyes and letting sleep overtake me again. When I woke, I could get up and do something productive. Rachel had been talking about getting tattoos soon, and despite my concussion, I felt like it would be fun. Maybe we could do that after I got out.

And then my eyes closed, and I was once again asleep.

After I was discharged, I met up with my friends in the dorms. They practically swaddled me, of course, though Ember took a bit of coaxing before I could get her to relax and calm down. We sat down for a while, me catching up on what happened after I'd blacked out.

Apparently, Eric had bolted from the side of the ring to my side only seconds after I'd fallen. Rachel remembered him yelling at Four to take over training before he hauled my limp body out, Ember following behind a few steps, looking a little hysterical.

Ember took over with the story there, sitting cross-legged on my bed, my shoulder against hers. "He wouldn't even speak to me the whole way there. He just looked…worried. Just like I was worried. But then he went all asshole-leader on me again when we got into the infirmary, and you woke up soon after." I frowned thoughtfully at her words, my heart feeling strangely warm at the thought that Eric was worried about me.

After we caught up on what happened in training, we went off towards where the shops were, Rachel grabbing my hand and leading me over to the tattoo parlor first. I was a little nervous about getting a tattoo, but everyone else was doing it, so I figured that I wouldn't be completely alone. Besides, getting the tattoo would probably make me feel more Dauntless in a way, and any confidence boost could help me.

There were multiple tattoo artists in the shop. Some were in their own separate rooms, and I guessed that those were meant for more private pieces where clients had to strip in order to have them done – though Dauntless members didn't seem to have an aversion to partial nudity by any stretch of the means.

Rachel dropped my hand soon after walking in, gasping at the artwork on the wall and darting over to look at the different options. I had no idea what I would want, so I followed behind, though at a slower pace. Luke was there next to me, and Ty was close by. Trace had ended up having to stay the night in the infirmary, where I'd gotten off lucky.

Ember apparently knew what she wanted, because she plucked a design off the wall and headed over to one of the artists, holding it out with a grin. I turned back to the wall, looking carefully at each one in front of me. Many of them were very cool, some even beautiful, but none of them really seemed to pop out to me. That was, until I saw it.

There was a design on the wall of a pair of wings, not too intricate, but still beautiful. The idea hit me like a freight train, and I found myself grabbing the glass design board and heading over to the only artist who didn't seem to be busy at the moment.

She was a little taller than me, though she didn't seem that much older. With tan skin and dark hair, tattoos littering her skin like they were made to be there, she looked beautifully Dauntless, a look that I wished to have soon, if I made it through initiation.

No, not if. I _would_ make it through. Without a doubt.

"Um, excuse me? Are you busy, or do you have an appointment?" My voice was questioning, though I was proud of myself for not sounding nervous. We had little to no contact with Dauntless adults outside of our trainers, so this was a little new for me. The woman looked up, though, and smiled lightly, shaking her head. "Ah, an initiate. I'm guessing you'd like something done? I've got an appointment in a little while, but I should be able to fit you in."

A smile curled on my lips, and I nodded, passing over the design for her to look. She gave it an appreciative glance, and I quickly told her my idea. "I'd like to have both wings as black, but maybe one with some blue in it, and the other with some red in it. Is that even possible?"

The artist looked from me to the piece, frowning thoughtfully for a moment. Then, she grinned, nodding back towards one of the private rooms. "It's more than possible. Now, it is a big tattoo, so you'll probably have to come in for two appointments. I can definitely get one half done tonight, though. I'm Tori, by the way."

I found myself grinning, too, as I followed her back to the room. I felt extremely sure about my choice of tattoo – it meant something to me, and that was what mattered. "Ari," I replied, though she gave me a look that made me think she already knew that. And, apparently, she did. "Oh, I know all about you, Ari. Don't ask me how, because I keep secrets quite well. But know that you've seemed to impress some of the higher-ups in our faction."

A blush crawled its way up my neck, my mind wandering to Eric on its own. No, there was no way that he would talk about me to others. Hell, half the time he was glaring at me, and the other half he was sweet. I didn't know what to make of it, especially after what happened in the infirmary.

It was no matter now, though, because I was slipping off my shirt and pulling down my bra straps, allowing Tori the room to work that she would need.

"Where would you like this placed," she asked as she began to set things up. I sat down in the chair, shifting a little, since I was only in a bra. I reminded myself that this was normal, though, and we were in a private room, so no one would be coming in randomly.

"I was thinking maybe on my actual shoulders, and not just on the shoulder blades. Maybe wrapping over the tops of my shoulders and arms, as well as my shoulder blades, almost like real wings would be? It would look different."

"And here, in Dauntless, different is good," Tori finished for me, nodding and turning on her machine. "I'll do your right side first. Is it okay for the red highlights to be on that side?" I nodded, moving to lay down on my stomach so she could start with my back. I had no doubt that this would hurt, but I was willing to take the pain for this. For him, my brother.

I forced myself to relax, closing my eyes and listening to the sounds of the buzzing needle as Tori finished setting up, taking her seat beside my shoulder and wiping off my skin. She was quiet for a few long moments, but then she did speak up, asking the question that I'd been expecting already.

"So, why this?"

I bit my lip lightly, taking a deep breath before speaking. "I'm a transfer from Erudite. My brother and I were very close, and he died a few years ago. Cancer. So the blue-highlighted wing would represent him, while the red-highlighted wing would be me, in Dauntless."

I fell silent after that, feeling a slight lump in my throat, but Tori didn't seem to mind. That was all the explanation she needed apparently, and judging by her empathetic look, I felt like she knew my pain.

And, speaking of pain, that was when it started.

I zoned out after a little while of the stinging pain, closing my eyes and focusing on other things. My shoulder went numb after a while, and I became so zoned out that I didn't even realize when the door to the room had opened, and someone had entered. I did notice, though, when Tori paused, tapping my lower back to get my attention.

"I'm going to take a small break. All that's left is the top of your shoulder and arm, and then the highlights. It won't take long."

That's when I noticed the other person in the room, and how she wasn't talking just to me, but to him, as well.

To Eric.

He was dressed casually, more casually than I'd seen him during training, and it made that strange warmth show up in my stomach again. He had taken a seat in the corner, looking relaxed and content to just be sitting there. "Take your time, Tori. Unlike Ari, I have all night to get mine done. She's the one who needs sleep," he said, glancing over to me and nodding a little in greeting.

My cheeks were burning as we locked eyes, because here I was, in only my bra, laying down on the tattoo chair and getting a tattoo in front of the one man that I'd just realized I wanted.

Damn my luck.

I nodded back silently, sitting up and maneuvering into a sitting position without touching the back of the chair with my newly tattooed skin. Tori replaced her inks before slipping back around to my side, planning on finishing it up. I took a deep breath as she began again, and I was proud that I stayed silent, though the skin on the top of my shoulder and arm was much more tender.

"So, I told Ari here about the certain higher-up that she'd seemed to make an impression on. Wonder who that could be," Tori said, her eyes looking up and into Eric's soul, a scary smirk curling on her lips. I bit my lip, not really knowing how to react to all of this, and just choosing to stay silent and still.

I didn't miss how Eric tensed a little in the corner, though, but he quickly relaxed, shaking his head and rolling his eyes. "Nothing ever gets by you, Tori," he grumbled, an almost affectionate tone to his voice. They were friends?—huh. Who would have thought?

"Damn right. Besides, I think that the girl deserves to know when someone talks about her 24/7," she replied, a teasing tone to her voice. My eyes popped open, though, heat rising to my cheeks instantly as I couldn't help but look at Eric, who was looking back at me. He looked like a mix of embarrassed and…content? Was that what I was seeing?

"Don't tell me that you're already pitting the faction against me, Eric," I found myself saying, not serious at all about the accusation. Before Eric could reply, though, Tori snorted. "Please. Pitting the faction against you is the complete opposite of this shithead's goal," she said as she finished the wing, moving on to the red highlights quickly and without pause. I bit my lip again, unable to help my inquisitive look at Eric. He was glaring at Tori, but I was sure that I saw his gaze soften a little bit when he looked at me. He looked a little vulnerable, and it took me aback for a moment.

"So I'm guessing you're one of the only people that can get away with calling Eric a shithead," I chose to ask Tori, figuring that, like me, Eric didn't want to talk about whatever the hell was going on in our heads at the moment in front of Tori. Again, she snorted, grinning lightly as she moved behind me to work on the highlights. "I'm practically the only person who could do it. He'll deny it to his dying breath, but it's true. Eric and I are _friends_, and don't let him tell you any different. And yes, Eric, we're friends. You drink my alcohol, so that means I at least tolerate you and you're included in my exclusive and short list of friends. Get over it."

I tried not to laugh, and luckily succeeded. It was a little funny, though, seeing Eric shoot Tori an annoyed look, though there didn't seem to be a lot of malice behind it. Was it because they were friends, or because of something more?

I didn't get the chance to answer my own thought, though, because Tori made a pleased noise as she turned off her machine, wiping away the last of the blood and ink and declaring me finished. With a last touch of finishing spray – it sealed the tattoo, prevented infections and scabbing, and stung like a bitch – Tori ushered me out of the chair and in front of the mirror, grinning proudly.

A gasp tore its way up my throat.

The wing was beautiful and intricate, with small lines of red throughout. It was gorgeous, overlapping my shoulder and upper arm, as well as my back shoulder blade. It made me feel strong, knowing that I'd just sat there and had this done to me. "It's gorgeous, Tori," I said, grinning as I turned around and nodded at her. I wasn't met with Tori's face, though. Instead, I was met with Eric, who had taken my seat in the tattoo chair.

Tori was nowhere to be found.

I had just met her, but I was already going to kill her.

I bit my lip, which was a bad habit of mine, and swallowed hard, feeling Eric's eyes on me like two little lasers in my skin. "You're right, it is gorgeous," he finally said after a moment, and I looked back at him, trying to read his facial expression.

Surprisingly, he looked open and relaxed, lounging back in the tattoo chair as if it were his own apartment. I smiled lightly, shrugging and running a hand through my hair. I didn't really know what to say to that, but I didn't have to say anything, because Eric spoke again: "You'll have to excuse Tori. She has no filter and believes that she is the ultimate matchmaker when it comes to me. And by that I mean that she's apparently decided that she's going to do everything that she can to get me to admit my…affection…for you, including leaving us in here alone until something happens."

My eyes widened as his words sunk in. I didn't care about Tori leaving us in here or playing matchmaker. I cared about Eric's admission. His admission of affection. Towards me.

Holy shit.

Eric seemed to read my mind, because he smirked lightly and sat up straight in the chair. "I'm your leader. You're my initiate. It's complicated. But, after all of this is done, or at least Stage One, things might change. But you…you need to know that I've always cared about you. Partially, because of your brother. But also because I was intrigued by you even before I defected. And I know that the chances of you ever agreeing to try something with me are slim, because I'm cold. I'm arrogant. I'm an asshole. I'm cruel, even. I get that. I have to be. But…I swear, every time I get around you I just…," he trailed off, running a hand over his face and shaking his head. I could tell that this was hard for him, admitting any sort of feelings for someone. It didn't help that I was his initiate, either.

I actually did speak up, then, taking a deep breath before stepping forward and closing about half of the distance between us. "You just what," I asked quietly, because my heart was pounding, and my head still hurt, and I _needed_ to know.

Eric looked back up at me, and I could see his Adam's apple bob with the force of his hard swallow. Feelings weren't easy for an ex-Erudite and Dauntless-leader. I understood that.

"You make me feel different. You are defiant as hell, but you also know when to take orders and listen. And I want to help you. I want to be near you when I could give two shits about the other initiates, and it's scary. It really is."

And there it was.

I sighed, smiling lightly and fidgeting on the spot for a long moment. The tension was palpable.

"I figured out that I wanted you back in the infirmary. And it's scary for me, too, because I feel like it's been building up for years and years. But I'm in training right now, and I don't want to jeopardize anything, or make anyone mad. But…I can say that, if I make it through training, then I'd be _extremely_ happy to explore that with you. And only you," I said quietly after a moment, looking at his shoulder, rather than into his eyes. This wasn't easy for me, either.

The look of hope in Eric's eyes took my breath away. It was like he was sixteen again, and that tugged at my heart a little.

"Deal," he said, nodding lightly.

"Deal," I echoed, and then the room went silent.

We both looked at each other for a few long moments, and I was just about to turn and leave when Eric reached out and wrapped his large hand around my smaller wrist.

"When you walk out of this room, you'll just my initiate again. Until the end of training. Got it?"

I nodded, turning back to look at him. I was expecting him to let me go, but it seemed that he was dead set on surprising me at every turn. Instead of letting go, Eric pulled me in, wrapping his free hand around the back of my neck and pulling my head down to his level.

He kissed me, and his lips were surprisingly soft against my own. Warmth spread through my entire body like a wildfire, and I found myself wanting more even after he pulled away.

"So we'll both have something to remember until then," he murmured, then let me go, but not after wrapping a finger with one of my red curls.

I smiled a little, my heart pounding in my chest as I pulled away and began backing away towards the door. "I'll make sure to remember that," I said before vanishing, escaping out into the cool air of the Dauntless compound.

It didn't fully sink in until I was sitting on my bed back in the dorm, waiting on my friends to return.

_Eric kissed me. Eric liked me. Eric wanted me. _

Wow.


	7. Capture the Flag and Final Fights

**Hi, guys! I'm so sorry for the late update. I've been extremely busy with schoolwork lately, and things are finally beginning to slow down. I'm so sorry, but I hope you enjoy this chapter. And yes, there's some exciting action in it. ;)**

The next weeks went by pretty smoothly. My friends could tell that I was considerably more relaxed and confident, and while some of them, like Rachel and Ember, were trying to read into it, the others just chalked it up to me 'finding my confidence' or some shit like that.

Only I knew that it had to do with knowing what my prize would be at the end of this stage, and of the entire training cycle, if I were to succeed. Not only would I be joining Dauntless, but I would also have a certain someone to look forward to, if we both still felt the same by then. I had no doubts that I would feel the same, because despite his cold exterior, I knew what Eric was like when he wasn't trying to be the fearless leader. I knew what the actual Eric was like.

He still frightened me sometimes, of course, but not in the terrorizing way. More of the intimidating way, where you are aware that they hold the power at the moment, but you trust them enough to not abuse it.

Training was good, too. Four and Eric had helped us improve our fighting skills, as well as other things: knife-throwing, shooting with guns, overall fitness, and tactical awareness. We were being honed, toned, refined, and beaten into our new forms – members of Dauntless and protectors of the city.

Rankings had switched around a lot in the last weeks, as well. I'd won all of my fights except one, which had put me in the top fifteen on the total scoreboard. I was above the halfway mark, and every time that I checked, most of my friends were around me, too. Ty was more towards the top, ranked fifth, and we were all proud as hell.

Except for Trace.

I didn't know what it was, but the Dauntless lifestyle just wasn't fitting for him. He was either too slow, too weak, or not thinking good enough while we were training. We all tried to help him out, giving him advice and offering extra training, but he never accepted it. I was beginning to get worried.

There were two more chances for rankings to change. The final fight, of course, and then whatever the hell we were doing now.

Four had woken us up just after we'd all went to bed, having to practically drag some of us from our mattresses. Now, we were all piled into a train car, Dauntless-born and transfers alike, waiting for instruction. Four dropped a large bag in the center between himself and Eric, looking around before beginning.

"We're going to play a game: Capture the Flag. Each of you will be armed with one of these," he help up a plastic gun-looking contraption, showing it to everyone, along with something that looked like a bullet, "as well as this ammunition. It's a neuro-stimulator dart, so it simulates the pain of a real gunshot, but without the damage. Goes away within minutes."

"Two teams," Eric piped up, looking around and sizing up the options. "Four and I will both be captains, and though we'll be involved, you're expected to do your planning and execution on your own, only with our help."

Everyone looked at Four, who nodded and turned. Apparently, he was picking first. Everyone was quiet as he looked around, and then our eyes locked. "Ari," he said, and my eyebrows shot up in surprise. Me? I was a first pick?

I looked over at Eric for the smallest second, just barely catching his frown before it was replaced by a mask of indifference. As directed, I stepped forward, moving to Four's side of the train car and taking the red glowing stick that was offered to me, looping it around my neck and waiting as the rest of the initiates were picked.

I ended up with Ty and Luke on my team, with Trace, Ember, and Rachel ending up on Eric's team. We exited the train car first, and I was proud of how smoother my landing had gotten. We took off running after Four as soon as our feet hit the ground, putting some space between us and where Eric's team would be getting off so we could strategize.

We ended up near the pier, which had a bunch of small buildings on and around it, before Four slowed down. The whole team stopped and grouped around him, though I knew he wouldn't be of any help. We had to strategize on our own.

I looked around us, taking in our surroundings and trying to think of the best plan. The others were talking amongst themselves, some even arguing about the best course of action, but I quickly cut in after a minute. "We should hide our flag somewhere. If we hide it, then we don't have to guard it, and almost all of our manpower can be used to find Eric's flag," I said. Everyone was quiet, thinking over the plan, and my heart was pounding. Would they reject it? Would they think it was stupid?

"Where do you want to hide it," a Dauntless-born girl asked, her dyed pink hair flying about in the wind. I bit my lip, looking around again, before getting an idea. "They're going to look in buildings, right? So we can't hide it in a building. Instead, we can hide it under the pier, close to the land, so it doesn't reflect on the water below. They'll never think to look there, and we can go searching for theirs."

The same girl grinned, reaching out her hand towards Four and beckoning for the flag. "I'm a good swimmer, so if I happen to fall, I'll be fine. Someone help me over the railing on the other side," she said as she stuffed the glowing flag under her jacket. If Eric's team was watching from afar, they wouldn't be able to see the flag as she moved over the pier.

The rest of us took up defensive positions, though Four caught me by my shoulder just before I crouched down behind a wall. "Good Erudite thinking," he said, nodding in approval before jogging over to the girl who would be placing the flag, probably planning on helping her over the railing.

I felt proud, suddenly, and a huge smile curled on my lips. Maybe this would help my ranking out? Coming up with the plan might not be rewarded by as many points as grabbing the flag, but it had to count for something, right?

Once the flag was well hidden, we regrouped and began to move. It was quiet and dark as we tiptoed through the area, taking cover every now and then for someone to climb high and scout out the surrounding area.

It was the third time that we'd sent a scout up high when we spotted them. The scout climbed back down in a hurry, grinning madly – a typical Dauntless-born.

"They're in and around the storage containers. I don't doubt that it's hidden in one of them. There's a few buildings around it, too, and we could probably place some of the people with better shots in them to act as sharpshooters." I immediately perked up, because I was a natural when it came to shooting. Maybe it was my brain, analyzing depth and height within seconds before I shot the target, or maybe it was just luck. Either way, I was one of the best shots in the transfers, and Four knew that.

"Alright, then. Ari, Phoenix, Luke, and Michael, I want you to take up sharpshooting positions in the buildings. You have to be quick and quiet, and be ready. There might be some of Eric's initiates in those buildings with the same idea as us. Wait for the signal to attack, and when you hear it, take out as many as you can without getting shot. The rest of us will attack, and we'll make sure that one or two of us gets through the mess to find the flag. Got it?"

All of us nodded, and we quickly turned off our glow lights, hoping for the cover of darkness. Phoenix, who was the pink-haired girl from before, was with me, while Michael and Luke were aimed at the other side of the storage containers. It was as quiet as death as we made our way through, and I made sure to watch where I was stepping, not wanting to blow our cover.

When Phoenix and I reached the first building, I motioned for her to go in. It was little more than a shed, but it had a window and a table in it. She would sit up on the table and shoot from there once the fighting began.

Once Phoenix was set up, I moved on, heading to the next building through the shadows provided by the moon. It was a little bit bigger, and I managed to slip inside. No one had spotted us, though I could hear voices nearby, and could sometimes see the flickering of blue glow lights – Eric's team.

I looked around the dark room, unable to make out part of it, but seeing a window that faced towards the storage containers. I was too close to the ground, though.

But I was in luck. There was a second story on this building.

I climbed the stairs as quietly as I could, scouting out the second floor before moving over to the window and setting up, sitting down on a chair and letting out a deep breath. I had a good vantage point from here, and I'd be able to make clean shots without being caught.

Perfect.

I sat there, waiting for a few minutes and trying to make out the forms of my own team. I couldn't see anything, so I figured they were doing well in the stealth department.

Just as I was relaxing, all hell broke loose.

I saw Ty, who was a big and intimidating guy in the first place, bust through two storage containers with a yell, obviously a distraction. It worked, though, because Eric's initiates took the bait and began to shoot, though Ty was quick enough to dodge behind a storage container. That left Eric's team open and vulnerable, though.

It was my time to shine.

I aimed, breathed out, shot. Aim, breath out, shoot. It was easy. I was a good shot.

It went like this for a few long minutes, and I could see where my team was now weaving in and out of storage containers easily, knowing that the four sharpshooters would have their backs. Everything was going as planned, until my shooting was interrupted.

I hadn't noticed someone enter my building. I hadn't noticed them climb the stairs. I actually didn't notice them until I felt a hand close over my mouth, the other one trapping my wrists and knocking the gun from my hands. I panicked, immediately going into fighting mode and slamming back into the broad and hard chest of who I could tell was a man. He grunted, but I didn't stop there, trying to twist around and get in a kick or a punch. I was unsuccessful, though, so I resorted to stomping on what I thought was his foot.

Turns out, it was, and the man's grip loosened on me, just enough for me to knock myself free and step away, breathing heavy and still in a panic.

And that's when I saw who it was.

Fucking _Eric_.

He was grinning, standing a few feet from me, his own gun nowhere in sight. It was just him and I, in the middle of this game, alone in this building. My fear melted away, though the competitive need to win was still very much alive.

"This was smart, really. Except for the fact that I could see you in the window, and I knew exactly where you were," he said, and I knew he was right. Well, next time I'd just have to change that. "Thanks for the advice," I said, a bit of sarcasm in my tone. I could tell that surprised him, because his smirk widened, and he took a small step towards me.

"The game isn't over yet, Ari. We're still on opposing teams, so I'd watch it," he said, a slight warning tone to his voice, though not the same warning tone he usually used during training. It was more…playful. Yeah. Eric was being _playful_.

I grinned at that, not answering verbally, but in my quick lunge at his chest. Eric was bigger and taller than I was, and that meant that he had a higher center of gravity – meaning, he was easier to knock down since he would be more prone to top-heaviness. I slammed into his chest, almost laughing as his breath wooshed out with a grunting sound, pushing him down and back on to the floor. He didn't hit very hard, clearly accustomed to knowing how to fall without injury, and I tried my best to pin him down.

It wasn't easy, but I managed to straddle his waist, trapping one of his arms against his side with my thigh, while I held the other one down with my hand over his head. This put us in a bit of a compromising position, but no one would be walking in on us. I'm pretty sure no one had seen me but Eric.

"Good," he said, a bit of leader-Eric in his voice, though his eyes said otherwise. Pride swelled up in my chest, though it was quickly subdued as he bucked his lips, not unseating me, but surprising me enough to get his other arm free. And then his arm was around my waist, yanking me down even closer to him, until we were chest-to-chest.

This wasn't sparring, or fighting. In the span of a few seconds, this had changed into something much different and much more serious.

But I couldn't exactly stop myself. I didn't want to stop myself.

We were both breathing heavily, our eyes locked, our faces barely even inches away. The moonlight was illuminating half of my face and half of his, the white light making his gray eyes shine bright. His arm was like a hot brand around my waist, holding me close to his body, his fingertips running along my side slightly.

"You've improved. I'll bet you came up with this plan, too," he murmured, and I bit my lip, trying not to smile proudly. Yes, I had, and it was working, by the sound of it.

Eric took that as a yes, and he smiled a little, taking a deep breath and looking thoughtful. "Not many people have managed to knock my on my back, Ariel," he added a moment later, and I really did grin, then, because _hell_ yes.

We were interrupted just after that by victorious yelling, and I recognized Ty's booming voice, yelling out in celebration. My grin widened, and I looked back at Eric, who looked a little annoyed, but also…proud?

I didn't have much time to think, planning on joining my team outside. I moved to stand up, but not before leaning down and whispering into Eric's ear: "This won't be the last time I'll have you on your back." I honestly don't know where that came from, or where the subsequent nip to his jaw came from, but I quickly got up, grabbing up my gun and darting downstairs to join the celebrations.

I liked this new side of me, the side that I couldn't explore in Erudite. The strong, confident, and dare-I-say sexy side of me that was always stamped down with books and test grades.

It felt good.

The train ride back was fun.

I kept sneaking glances at Eric, who looked annoyed in the corner at his team's loss. But, every time we would lock eyes, I saw a heat there, one that I knew I was responsible for. And it made me smile, because I'd felt it, too.

Rachel, Ember, and Trace were all a little bummed that they'd lost, but we were all too busy telling stories about the night to feel sorry for losing or winning. After a few minutes, Phoenix came and joined us, plopping down beside me and throwing an arm around my shoulder, bragging loudly about how our plan had been genius and everyone else could, "Go suck a tit."

She and some other Dauntless-born even walked with us back to the dorms, only leaving once we were all changed and about to pass out again. There would be no training the next day, since final fights were after lunch, so we were all allowed to sleep in.

I went to bed that night with three things on my mind. The first, was the fight tomorrow. Who would I fight? What would happen? What would my ranking be?

The second was Visiting Day. Visiting Day had been pushed back a week or so, and would come the day after our final fights. Rankings wouldn't be announced until that night, so we'd have all day to our families, and after they left, we'd know the results of Stage One. I was excited to see my parents. I really was.

The last thing was Eric. Stage One would be ending in a matter of days, and I wasn't sure what would happen after that. Apparently, Stage Two was different, and Eric and Four wouldn't be training us as much as just watching over us. I guess I'd have to wait and see.

I was paired up with Michael.

It had turned out that he was more ruthless than we'd imagined, and he had a serious height advantage on me. On any normal day, barefoot, I'd probably stand at about Eric's neck. But Michael?—he was a few inches taller, though not as big as Eric. I came to his shoulder at the most, and that put me at a disadvantage.

I was faster, though. Much faster. I would use that to my advantage.

We were towards the end of the fighting lineup. Rachel had to fight another kid from Candor, and she ended up winning. Ty and Luke had to fight each other, and Luke came out on top, which even surprised him. Ty had advanced into the top three in rankings, though, so it wouldn't hurt him. Four even said so himself.

Ember had to fight Trace. Ember beat the crap out of him, and he didn't even fight back. We were all shocked, and Ember was hurt and confused. Why wouldn't he fight back?—well, he'd given up. Everyone knew it.

I hated it.

All thoughts of Trace escaped my mind, though, when it was my turn to fight. Michael and I stepped up onto the platform, and I caught Eric's eyes briefly. He gave me the slightest of nods, though I wasn't even expecting that much. It boosted my confidence, though, and I loosened my muscles, taking a deep breath and watching Michael carefully.

And that's when I noticed it.

He was favoring his right leg, and my mind flashed back to the week before, when he'd been hit fairly hard by another initiate during a fight. If he was favoring it, then that meant it still hurt. And I could use that.

I didn't have much time to think, though, because Four called for us to start, and Michael lunged.

I deftly stepped out of the way, sliding my feet along the ground and watching as he regained his balance and sneered at me, already looking angry. "I'm going to enjoy beating your ass, Erudite," he practically snarled, taking another step forward. He used his right leg to step forward, though, so as I dodged his punch, I also delivered a hard jab to his upper leg, trying to figure out where the hurting spot was.

It was there. How did I know?—because Michael cried out in pain the second that I hit it, and I hurried to get past his fallen defense, sliding on top of him and pinning him down by his waist. I was lighter than him, so he could probably buck me off, but not before I got a few good hits on him.

I delivered one sharp punch to his jaw, and he blocked the next one, though I was able to jab him in the throat before he bucked me off, coughing loudly.

But now I was on the ground, and I was at a disadvantage. I scrambled to get up, but not before an enraged Michael all but tackled me, showing absolutely no technique, slamming me into the hard floor and landing on top of me. Now, he was the one straddling me, though he had a longer reach than I did.

Shit.

I lifted my hands, covering my face with my forearms and blocking a few punches. I would definitely have bruises to show for it.

I could hear my friends cheering for my in the background, and I ground my teeth together, thinking through my situation. And then I thought of it. I could still use his leg against him, after all, it was right there.

In between punches, I shifted my arm, bringing my elbow down hard on Michael's upper leg. It hurt him enough to make his legs loosen, and I managed to slide out from underneath him, delivering a smooth kick to the chest as I moved away from him. It sent him sprawling back, and I stood back up, following him back to the center of the ring and crouching to press one of my knees into his sternum. He couldn't move without hurting himself, now, which was good.

I took advantage of his labored state and punched him again, only this time, I hit him square in the nose, breaking it and causing blood to immediately spill. I clenched my jaw, forcing myself to punch him in the jaw one last time, ensuring he'd stay down, before getting back up. Four had called the fight just as I'd delivered the last blow, and my eyes widened in realization.

I'd won. I'd won the final fight.

I was engulfed in a few different pairs of arms, all of which belonged to my friends. We had all done well, and we were all almost guaranteed to make it to Stage Two. Well, except for Trace. But he'd chosen to give up, and that attitude wasn't tolerated in Dauntless.

The fights concluded soon after, and Four and Eric dismissed us. Everyone began to file out, some limping and some with their heads held high. I followed behind my friends, but not before sneaking one last look at where Eric was standing, throwing towels over some of the bloody spots on the ring.

Our eyes met, and I swore I could see pride in them. I dared to throw him a toothy grin, and I was surprised to see him return it, since we were in public. Pleasantly surprised.


	8. (Almost) Welcome to Dauntless

**So, this is a super long chapter. It was actually meant to be split up into two different parts, but I realized that the first part was extremely short, and I felt like I should give ya'll a bit more story than that. :) Anyways, I hope you enjoy, and as always, reviews are welcome!**

We were standing in the Pit in an orderly line, waiting for our families to show up. It was Visiting Day, and I was nervous as hell.

I'd worn some black leggings, boots, and a tank top, so my tattoo was fully visible. I was planning on going and getting the other half done sometime in the days after the rankings were announced and Stage One was over. I had seen some of the other initiates struggling to cover their bruises and new tattoos or piercings, but I wore mine with pride. It showed that I was a part of Dauntless, now, that I _would_ be Dauntless, and that was something to be proud of.

I stood between Rachel and Ember, our shoulders brushing, and I could practically feel Ember vibrating with barely-contained energy. She had two younger siblings that she was eager to see, and I was happy for her.

Admittedly, I was nervous to see my parents. But, I was also excited, because I truly did miss them. And it wasn't long before my hopes were answered, because parents clad in different colors began filtering into the Pit, and the tentative silence turned into laughing and talking within seconds. I searched the oncoming crowd for any hint of blue, and that's when I saw them.

Four had warned us not to seem too attached, since that would be insinuating that we'd regretted choosing Dauntless. So, I kept my cool, walking forward and meeting them halfway, a small smile on my face.

I don't think they even recognized me for a second, but when they did, my mother teared up, and they both pulled me in for a hug. "Oh, Ariel, you look so grown up," she whispered, and I laughed lightly at that. It was probably the newly-added-on muscles and tattoo that made me look more mature, and I certainly wasn't mad about that.

"I go by Ari, now, actually. And I feel a bit more grown up," I said as I pulled away, my father ruffling my hair a little. I didn't even feel annoyed at it, just happy. We wouldn't talk very often, if at all, after this day, so I was going to get my fill in, damn it.

"So, how do you like it here? Are they treating you well? Are you getting along with the others?" I tried not to roll my eyes at my mother, though it was hard. I felt like I was in the third grade again, though I didn't mind. At least she was concerned about my wellbeing. "I love it, really. It's tough, and we're at the bottom of the totem pole at the moment, but I'm doing just fine. And I've made some new friends, too."

Speaking of, a certain Dauntless leader – who was totally not just my friend, but not quite anything substantial, as of yet – decided to walk up behind me, keeping a safe amount of distance away, but stopping close to the three of us. I jumped a little at the sound of his voice, but quickly relaxed, knowing exactly why he was here.

"Mr. and Mrs. Caesar," he said politely, and I watched my parents' faces in amusement. They didn't even recognize him for a long moment, what with his cut hair, larger build, piercings and tattoos. But, after I let out a small laugh, my parents both caught on, and I could see the exact moment that they realized who this was.

"Eric," my mother breathed, her eyes watering again as she all but yanked him into a hug, which was truly funny. My mother was a smaller woman, and to see her manhandle Eric like that was funny.

But what really surprised me, was that he hugged her back. I was glad that none of the initiates were actually paying attention, because I knew Eric wouldn't want them to see him actually acting human for once. After he pulled away from my mom, he shook hands with my dad, and I could even see a hint of emotion in my father's eyes at seeing Eric again.

"It's good to see you, Eric," my father said, nodding in approval. I decided to step in, then, so my mom wouldn't immediately blast him with questions. "Eric is a leader here in Dauntless. The youngest one to be appointed, if I'm not mistaken. He's also one of my instructors," I said with a meaningful tone, hoping that my parents would catch on.

And, with their Erudite mentality, they caught on quickly. It wouldn't do to act mushy and teary-eyed around Eric, since the other members and initiates of Dauntless were nearby. He had a reputation and an image to uphold for us initiates, and he had to keep that intact.

Eric glanced over at me, and I managed to not grin, but I knew that my eyes softened a little bit. "Well, I'm afraid I have some business to attend to. The end of the first part of our initiation is tonight, and I have to prepare for it," he said, looking away from me after that long moment and to my parents. They both nodded, deciding to shake his hand as a goodbye instead of a hug. We didn't look at each other as he walked off, since some of the other initiates had begun skipping between family and friends, introducing people and being way too observant.

I introduced my parents to my friends, though Trace wasn't that responsive. His parents hadn't shown, which I felt bad for, but he left about halfway through the Visiting Day for the dorms, so I didn't really think too hard about him. Out of sight, out of mind type thing.

My parents did notice my tattoo, and while they were both skeptical, they nodded in understand when I told them about the other half I'd be getting done.

It was for my brother, and that's all the excuse they needed.

The rest of Visiting Day went by fairly well. I gave my parents a small tour of what we were allowed to show, including a trip to the tattoo parlor so they could meet Tori. She, of course, immediately set off on telling my parents about my unnamed-admirer, and how he was completely into me. I, of course, stood off to the side and behind my parents' shoulders, glaring at her fiercely.

She'd pay for that later.

But, when it was time for my parents to depart, all I focused on was them. We said our final goodbyes, hugging for a few long minutes before they disappeared, piling into the trucks that Dauntless had provided as transport vehicles for the parents.

Time passed quickly after they left. My friends and I met up in the dining hall again, digging into our food a little early, since we knew that we'd be seeing our rankings tonight just after dinner.

It was quiet, and everyone was tense. Even Ty, who I knew would be at the top somewhere, looked nervous. Rankings were based off of how the instructors and leaders believed we were progressing, and how fit we were for Dauntless. That meant that, even if someone was the top initiate in fighting, they could be cut for not having the right Dauntless mentality.

It was scary.

Finally, though, the time came around, and all of us initiates, Dauntless-born and transfers alike, piled into the training room and came to a stop in front of the blank board. Eric and Four were standing on either side of it, and I immediately took my place near my friends, clasping Rachel's hand in my own, Ember on her other side. To my surprise, Phoenix came up and threw her arm around my shoulders, looking nervous herself.

We didn't have time to think much about our nerves, though, because Eric tapped the screen, and the rankings showed up.

_1\. Phoenix_

_2\. Ty_

_3\. Matthew_

_4\. Ari_

_5\. Luke_

_6\. Rachel_

_7\. Ember_

_8\. Michael_

_…_

_20\. Trace_

At first, I felt sad. I had looked from the bottom to the top for my name, and Trace was at the very bottom, his name in red.

Trace was out. He was gone. He'd be Factionless.

But then, my friends began cheering and whooping, and I was caught up in a huge hug by Rachel. That's when I noticed the other names, the names of the people who had made it through.

I was number four. I was in fourth place. I was past the first stage.

My laughs of joy joined the chorus of happy yells, and I could swear that I saw the barest hints of smiles on Four and Eric's faces. We were all so elated that we hadn't even noticed a few Dauntless adults coming in and taking away those whose names were in red – about six people. Trace was one, and if any of us had been paying attention, we'd have seen that he didn't even try to fight. None of them did. They were still shell-shocked.

I probably would have felt remorseful, too, if I hadn't known that Trace had done it to himself. He didn't even try in training, and had slacked off more than once. It was almost as if he'd asked for the punishment of becoming Factionless.

After everything had died down, Phoenix and some of the other Dauntless-born grabbed us up and hauled us with them to the Pit, where there was music blaring and people dancing. We were allowed a few days' rest after Stage One, and this was the huge celebration to kick off the ending of our physical training. According to Phoenix, though, this party would be nothing compared to the one at the end of Stage Three.

I couldn't wait. I knew I'd be there. I would be Dauntless.

Hangovers hurt like a bitch.

The ending of Stage One was followed by a huge party, and three days of rest. We initiates were allowed to move around the compound, meeting more Dauntless adults and spending our saved up points on clothing, tattoos, and piercings.

On the night before Stage Two began, I was finally ready to go get the other half of my tattoo finished. My right wing had healed almost completely, and I believed it symbolic, finishing the tattoo just before the next stage of training.

I hadn't seen Eric over the three days of rest, not even at meals, so it definitely came as a surprise when I walked into Tori's private room and found him sitting in the corner, looking quite perturbed. Tori was preparing the inks and such, and she shot me a warning look when I walked in. It practically screamed, _'Don't say anything that will make him feel cornered. He's a ticking time bomb'_.

So, I was smart, and I didn't say a word, just smiled softly in his direction before slipping into the tattoo chair. I lifted my shirt over my head, letting Tori set it beside her equipment, before laying down on my stomach. My head was turned towards Eric, and I frowned a little at his angry disposition.

He looked back at me, his eyes locked on mine, and it took me a few minutes to gain my confidence and speak. "What happened," I tried, my voice barely above a whisper. All I got in return was a shaking of his head. So, I tried again. "Why are you here, and not punching something in the training room?"

Tori actually snorted at my shoulder, having started the tattoo. The biting pain of the needle helped keep me calm and grounded quite easily.

Eric sighed a little, leaning his head back against the wall, but keeping his eyes locked on mine. "You calm me down," was all he said, and though his voice was rough and short, I knew that he meant it. Tori hit an especially tender spot, then – probably a still sore muscle – and I winced, closing my eyes for a moment.

When I opened them again, Eric had moved the chair to my side silently, and was now extremely close. I could smell him, actually, and he smelled good. He really did. At one point, I would have expected him to smell like sweat and the leather of the punching bags. But now, I could actually tell that it was a mixture of a minty smell and an earthy smell.

I liked it. I never thought I would like the way someone smelled, but apparently that was a thing, now.

I reached out with my right hand, finding one of Eric's and holding on loosely. I didn't exactly need it, because the pain had faded, but it still felt good to hold his hand. The human contact felt very nice.

To my surprise, Eric gripped my hand back, his thumb rubbing over my knuckles. I looked back up at his face, seeing that his jaw wasn't clenched anymore, and his eyes looked a little less furious. I could also almost feel Tori's smugness radiating off of her like radiation. I'd never hear the end of this.

"Stage Two starts tomorrow," I heard Tori say, and I wasn't sure if she was talking to me or to Eric. I figured out that she was talking to Eric, though, "Are you administering the tests?"

I saw Eric nod, and I frowned thoughtfully. Test?

"I wonder how this one'll do," Tori added, emphasizing her point with a poke to the small of my back. My frown grew, then, and Eric looked back down at me, seeming thoughtful for a long moment. "I think she'll do fine," he said. "Ariel here tends to overcome obstacles like a professional."

I flushed at the use of my full name, though I liked the way that it rolled off his tongue. Eric seemed to notice, and I swore that I could see the barest hint of a smirk in his eyes.

Tori shifted behind me, continuing with my tattoo in silence. It was a comfortable silence. I closed my eyes, enjoying the feeling of Eric by my side and the tattoo needle on my back. I zoned out after a little while, up until Tori stopped her work to change the ink colors. Opening my eyes, I sat up, stretching a little bit and yawning. I was fully aware that Eric was sitting there, witnessing me topless in a bra, but it actually didn't bother me as much as I thought it would. He was being respectful and looking away, down at my knee to be exact, and it made me grin lightly.

Who knew that the ruthless Dauntless leader would be a gentleman at heart?

When Tori poked my side, I got the message and laid back down, allowing her to continue her work. I reached out with one hand, resting it on Eric's thigh. He was tense again, and I locked eyes with him, looking confused. Something bad must have happened to have made him this angry for this long.

Eric looked hesitant, like he would just dismiss my worry again, but then he leaned back in his chair, resting his hand over mine again and clenching his jaw. "Leadership stuff. Max putting more pressure on me for certain things. We got into it, and it almost came to blows."

I could feel Tori freeze behind me, and I could almost imagine the wide-eyed look on her face. Max was a large and scary man, just like Eric, and even I blanched at the thought of the two of them ending up in a full-on, no-holds-barred fight. It would have ended bad for the both of them, I'm sure.

"I guess we don't get to know what the fight was about, huh," I asked, my voice light. He visibly relaxed and shook his head, sending me a forced smile. "Unfortunately, no. But this helps."

I knew he was talking about this – sitting here with me. It caused a warm feeling in the pit of my stomach, one that both unsettled me and excited me.

Tori was done after a few more minutes, wiping it down with a gleeful smile and ushering me over to the mirror. I turned my back to it, and a huge smile curled on my lips at what I saw. The other wing was finished, with blue highlights running through the tattooed feathers, and _God_ it was gorgeous. I turned back around and yanked her into a hug, smiling broadly. "Thank you so much," I whispered, pulling away after a moment to look over my tattoo again. Eric was still in his chair, but I could see his reflection in the mirror, and he looked pleased as well.

All-in-all, the night had ended well. Tori covered it up after spraying it with the setting spray, and then she left us alone, shooting me a meaningful look that made me blush.

The kiss that Eric gave me after that would be burned into my memory for weeks – even months. He'd practically launched himself from the chair to pull me against him, his lips crashing down onto mine in the same second. It wasn't gentle, but it wasn't angry, and I loved it.

We couldn't act like this in public, and we both knew it. Not until the end of initiation. And maybe that's why Tori left us alone – she was giving us a chance to be together without anyone asking questions.

Bless her.

Once we'd both had our fill of kisses, I exited the private room, hugging Tori one more time before retreating to the initiate dorms.

I wasn't exactly well-versed in relationships, since it was never logical to begin one in Erudite before the Choosing Ceremony, but even I understood what the warm feeling in the pit of my stomach represented. I was developing stronger feelings, and it was scary. Well, maybe not scary. Just intimidating.

I went to sleep with that warm feeling in my stomach, and a smile on my face.

I woke up to screaming.

It wasn't like the yells of Eric and Four in the morning when they were trying to wake us up. No, this scream was a bloodcurdling shriek of horror.

It took a long moment for it to register in my brain, but when it did, I bolted out of bed wide-eyed, trying to find the source of the sound. By then, everyone was awake and panicking. I forced myself to stay calm and followed the sound, running out into the hallway that linked our dorms with the Dauntless-born dorms. And there, in the hallway, laid a pink-haired young girl, something sharp sticking out of her throat.

_Phoenix_.

My heart dropped into my stomach, and I bolted past the initiate who had screamed, collapsing down next to my new friend and hauling her upper-half into my lap. She was choking, and I could see the small piece of metal sticking out of her throat. It was obstructing some of the blood flow, which was prolonging her bleeding out. I couldn't find it in myself to pull it out, though.

Instead, I brushed her bright pink hair away from her face, tears clouding my vision as she looked up at me. The fear that I saw in her eyes was almost tangible, and I choked back a sob as I tried to console her: "It's okay, I've got you. I've got you," I whispered as best I could.

I didn't notice the people surrounding us. I didn't notice the leaders yelling for initiates to move. I didn't notice Phoenix's blood all over my body. I didn't notice the arms that wrapped around me, pulling me away from her limp and cold body.

I was numb.

Phoenix's body was taken away in silence, as was I. I remembered nothing after I saw her body disappear around the corner, limp and cold in Four's arms. I remembered nothing from then on, my mind only turning back on at the low and insistent calling of my name.

There was a soft couch underneath me, one that I did not recognize. The room was light and airy despite the fact that it was past midnight, and it took me a long moment to realize that I was not in the dorms – I was in an apartment. My hands were being held by two other hands, ones that were the same size as mine, and only a little rougher.

Tori was kneeling in front of me, a concerned look on her face. Her hands enveloped mine, gentle despite the heavy feeling in the air. "Ari," she said quietly, barely above a whisper, "come on, Ari. Come back to us. The leaders need to ask you a few questions."

That's when I noticed the other black-clad shapes in the apartment. Max stood directly behind Tori, looking hard and intimidating, but with the slightest hint of understanding in his otherwise cold gaze. At his right shoulder stood Eric, and nearby stood another man who I recognized as Harrison – one of the other leaders of Dauntless.

I felt my heart seize up at the realization of what had happened, and I quickly clamped my hands down on Tori's finding the strength I needed there to keep myself together.

"Okay," I whispered, and Tori gave me a sympathetic smile, nodding at Max and taking the seat next to me.

Max looked at me for a second, and I found myself straightening my back, trying to appear stronger in the face of one of my new leaders. He seemed to notice this, and I saw the barest hint of an approving smile on his face, before it vanished, and was replaced by the hard mask again.

"I understand that this is new for you. I doubt that murder was a normal or even a rare occurrence in Erudite, so this is a foreign situation. Still, though, I need as many facts as I can before opening up an investigation. While simple fights are tolerated – and sometimes even encouraged, if they foster competition between initiates – murder is not tolerated under any circumstances. Which is why I need you to recount tonight's events from the very beginning, as you can remember them, to the best of your ability."

Silence overtook the apartment, and I had to swallow hard in order to keep from whimpering. I hated this feeling. I truly did. I felt weak, and pathetic, being reduced to a whimpering and frozen mess in front of the leaders of Dauntless – in front of _Eric_. I glanced over at him after a moment and immediately looked away, shame burning in my eyes. This was not how a Dauntless would act.

But I wasn't all Dauntless, was I? I was Divergent. But I couldn't tell anyone that.

So, I cleared my throat, clenching my jaw and looking at Max. "I went to bed, just like everyone else. I was exhausted, since I'd spent a few hours with Tori finishing up the tattoo on my back and shoulders. So, after leaving, I just crashed. Passed out cold in my bed. And then…then I woke up to screaming."

I had to pause and take a deep breath, closing my eyes and steeling myself for the mental images that I knew would come. "At first, I didn't think it was real. Maybe it was just my imagination, or one of the lucid dreams that we used to learn about in Erudite, when we reviewed the stages of sleeping. But then I realized that it wasn't. It was real."

"Almost immediately, I got up and followed the sound of screaming. I felt an overwhelming need to see what was wrong, to _help_ whoever was hurt. So, I ran out, and there they were. One of the initiates, a girl, was standing there, screaming and shaking. And there was Pho-," I paused, my voice cracking, before I regained my composure again, "And there was Phoenix's body. She was still breathing, but she was bleeding and choking."

Max interrupted me there, and I was almost thankful for the chance to calm my racing heart. I still refused to look at Eric, though I could feel his eyes burning into the side of my head. I couldn't.

"The girl in the hallway, did you ever expect her to have been the one who harmed the initiate?"

I shook my head immediately, forcing my brain and my heart back into the Erudite mindset in order to get through this questioning. Hard, logical, and unfeeling. The Erudite way.

"She had no blood on her clothes or her hands from what I could see. And her scream was too terrified to have been faked. With the way that Phoenix was bleeding out, the murderer would have had to have gotten blood on them at some point, even if it was only a little. So, no, I don't think it was her."

Max seemed satisfied with my answer, and waved for me to continue, so I did.

"I recognized Phoenix, and I couldn't help it. We met during the Capture the Flag game, and I'd made a friend out of her. She was one of the first of the Dauntless-born to accept me, and I was grateful for that. I guess you could say that I even cared about her as a friend, in a way. So I ran to her, and held her. Tried to ease her passing a little bit. It didn't help any, I know, because she still died slowly, but I couldn't just _not _do something."

And then I was done. The lump in my throat had come back, and my hands were shaking. Tori held them a little tighter, and I drew as much strength from her as I could.

It was silent for some time after that, and the silence was only broken when Max spoke up, and air of finality in his voice. "That's all that I needed. Thank you for your cooperation, Ari. Eric," he turned to his second-in-command, nodding slightly, "I expect you to make sure that this initiate is settled in well with Tori here, tonight. She'll need to be at training tomorrow, but she's too shaken to stay with the other initiates."

"She'll be well taken care of, Max," Tori said, standing up and motioning to the door. Max and Harrison moved towards it, and that's when I noticed that Tori was in her pajamas – this must be her apartment.

Eric stayed put, though I still refused to look at him. Tori showed the other two leaders out, locking the door securely before leaning back against it with a sigh. Once again, silence overtook the room, only this time, it was broken by Tori. She was looking at Eric, an unreadable expression on her face.

"I'm going to help her shower and get changed. You stay in here, you understand?—then I'll let you talk to her."

I risked the tiniest glance at Eric to see his reaction, and he didn't look happy. But I still felt ashamed and embarrassed at my reaction, so I quickly looked away before Eric could look back at me. He huffed after a long moment, making a show of collapsing into a recliner as Tori helped me up and into the bathroom.

The water was hot on my skin, but I was glad for it. It was burning away the memories of Phoenix's blood on my skin, her cold body in my lap.

Tori leant me a set of her clothes to wear. They were about my size – a pair of shorts that were a little shorter than I usually wore them, and a tank top. I followed her back into the living room once I was done changing, my hair in a loose braid down my back, my skin still a little damp from the steamy bathroom.

Eric sat in the same spot that he'd been in before, though he quickly vacated the recliner once he saw me. Tori had left us alone, retreating into her bedroom for a few minutes. I stood still as Eric's arms enveloped me, though the combination of his warmth, his scent, and his arms wrapped around me soon had me melting into his embrace, my hands fisting in his black vest.

"It isn't going to be easy, but you're strong, you hear me? You're one of the strongest people I've ever known. You stuck by your brother's side for months as he died, and you chose Dauntless for yourself, and you've done so well. You can get through this, Ariel. You can come out of this stronger than before."

His voice was quiet, only for the two of us, his warm breath tickling the shell of my ear. His words had the intended impact, and my heart rate slowed gradually.

We stood like that for a few minutes, Eric's arms wrapped around my waist and my shoulders, his face buried in my hair, my face in his chest. After a while, though, I felt him shift, and I pulled back with watery eyes. "I have to leave now. Max'll want to debrief us before opening up an investigation, and I need to prepare Phase Two still. Get some rest. Tori will take good care of you."

The last sentence was directed to someone behind me – Tori – with a knowing look. I could almost feel her roll her eyes and scoff, and I may have smiled if I weren't feeling so shitty.

Eric looked back down at me after a moment, pressing a light kiss to my forehead before heading towards the door silently, Tori locking the door behind him.

I went to sleep beside the tattoo artist that night, curled into a ball wrapped around a pillow, the memory of Phoenix's body still engrained into my mind.


End file.
